Why sometimes I feel like a failure at life...

The morning these photos were taken, I was so burned out and exhausted from my business launch and over-all-biz-hustle that I could barely get out of bed to take part in this beautiful, luxurious (and pricey) photoshoot.

I decided to do this photoshoot on the ocean in California (on a rented boat none the less) because it was so important to me that my brand image reflected not only beautiful images of wallpaper and design, but beautiful images of life as well. And to me, nature and sunshine, freedom and beautiful things are a distinct part of my dream life, and so I thought at the time that this really aligned with the lush and beautiful life I so deeply desire to create for myself and others.

BUT.. In hindsight, I feel that these beautiful aspirational images profoundly missed the mark - in so many ways. While living our beautiful dream lives can absolutely involve sunshine, ocean and even yachts if we so choose.. living a truly fulfilled, peaceful and joyful life is so much more about what fills our minds and hearts, in the minute to minute of our every day day.

This photo humbles me, and reminds me of what I want to, and what I feel I absolutely MUST share in this precious life. It reminds me of all the things I’ve learned along the way in the past 3 careers and 15 years of active searching for happiness, peace, success and fulfillment. From alternative medicine  to mindfulness, from Buddhist retreats to yoga retreats, from self-help books to spiritual books, from businesses coaches to transformation coaches, from coaching programs to biz programs and You-Name-It-I've-Tried-It.

And at the end of the day, after all of the years (and books and courses and and careers, and therapists!) there’s only one thing I know for sure - that happiness and peace really are an inside job. That these things come (first and foremost) from deep within in, and cannot be brought out by anything (or anyone,) other than our infinite selves. We have all the answers within us - always and forever - just waiting to come out - in perfect divine timing, in prefect divine ways for each and every one of us. And it's different for each and every one of us... Which is why looking outside for the path can be so painful.

Gratefully, I know now what it’s like to experience a quiet yet profound joy that feels as expansive as the whole Universe. I know moments of pure divine creative inspiration. I know moments of feeling the infinite possibilities of life coursing through every part of me. I know the feeling of the magnificent between happy and sad.

I know what it’s like to feel and KNOW that I am the creator of my life and my destiny, and I also know the utter hopelessness of forgetting this. I know only too well what it's like to live out of alignment with these things - and it's a painful life.

For the most part, these moments of simple, divine beauty in my life didn’t happen on yachts LOL.. but rather in the humble contemplations and clumsy growth of a constantly evolving human soul.

This photo now reminds me of how often in the last 15 years I've lost the plot, veered off course (and sometimes still do), and ultimately lived for so long in misalignment with my truest self, my brightest light, my infinite power and my higher calling for the majority of my life.

I’m sharing this today, because I’m certain I’m not alone. 

..And because we're all worthy of living living our dream lives. We're all worthy of being happy. We're all worthy of everything we want, and so much more.

So, I'm going to be sharing weekly thoughts, insights and interviews on all the ways I believe that we can cultivate a beautiful and meaningful life, inside us and in the world around us - and I’d just love if you came along for the ride :)

Looking forward to getting to know you better...